Haha i feel like eating a big chocolate banana cake all of a sudden.
Oh yeah wow it's been a long time since i blogged.
Whoo.
Haha, tmr is the last paper for prelims!
MCQ, gotta study still haha.
Physics is so hard, gotta try cram in those formulas haha.
Shall go study now.
Stop getting distracted haha!
Oh yeah wow it's been a long time since i blogged.
Whoo.
Haha, tmr is the last paper for prelims!
MCQ, gotta study still haha.
Physics is so hard, gotta try cram in those formulas haha.
Shall go study now.
Stop getting distracted haha!
- Mood:
high
Today's the first day of prelims.
Didn't turn out well haha.
Sigh, topics i study for SS didn't come out.
Lucky i had abit of nonsense to squeeze me through.
Oh well more days to come.
Gotta do well!
She's finding me out
It's bringing me down
Cause nothings as hard as the first time
I'm fooling myself
She'll never be mine
It's to late now
Didn't turn out well haha.
Sigh, topics i study for SS didn't come out.
Lucky i had abit of nonsense to squeeze me through.
Oh well more days to come.
Gotta do well!
She's finding me out
It's bringing me down
Cause nothings as hard as the first time
I'm fooling myself
She'll never be mine
It's to late now
- Mood:
uncomfortable
Chinese results tmr!
I mean today haha.
Hmm kinda forgot about it haha.
Shit really scared, it all depends on this.
If i get bad grades, then i gotta start POA chionging.
Focus, attention, success.
Gotta really just focus.
O's o's o's.
After that then other things can come but now.
O's first.
It'll all get better in time.
Slowly.
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that doubt is the greatest gift, - it's the space between two certainties.
I mean today haha.
Hmm kinda forgot about it haha.
Shit really scared, it all depends on this.
If i get bad grades, then i gotta start POA chionging.
Focus, attention, success.
Gotta really just focus.
O's o's o's.
After that then other things can come but now.
O's first.
It'll all get better in time.
Slowly.
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that doubt is the greatest gift, - it's the space between two certainties.
Any change on its way from one place of stability to the next one, passes through a period of doubt. Your old perspective has to disintegrate, and doubt comes in for a visit - even if only for a moment, before the new perspective takes root. Doubt is your greatest gift, because from doubt you can go anywhere."
- Mood:
tired
The party was awesome last night.
It cheered me up quite abit.
Really drank till we were high last night.
Really felt like crap.
But oh well, life has to go on.
Woke up in the morning and the thought came back again.
Sigh.
But it was good ytd just talking to my good friends.
Drank to the problems, that they may be gone.
The journey ahead is gonna be even harder.
I've really gotta force myself to let go.
It's gonna be so very hard.
And i don't know if i can really bring myself to do it.
But if i don't, i'd make things even worse.
Sometimes i just hoped things weren't so complicated.
And everything would just go smoothly.
Sometimes i ask myself, why everything i do seems wrong.
Gotta really forget it now.
I don't want to, but i have no choice..
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that it is time to finally forgive yourself.
It cheered me up quite abit.
Really drank till we were high last night.
Really felt like crap.
But oh well, life has to go on.
Woke up in the morning and the thought came back again.
Sigh.
But it was good ytd just talking to my good friends.
Drank to the problems, that they may be gone.
The journey ahead is gonna be even harder.
I've really gotta force myself to let go.
It's gonna be so very hard.
And i don't know if i can really bring myself to do it.
But if i don't, i'd make things even worse.
Sometimes i just hoped things weren't so complicated.
And everything would just go smoothly.
Sometimes i ask myself, why everything i do seems wrong.
Gotta really forget it now.
I don't want to, but i have no choice..
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that it is time to finally forgive yourself.
You've carried the guilt, the shame for long enough. You've kept your wounds open for long enough. The time has to come to let go, to heal. Keep the lessons and let the pain heal. Yes, you know what we are talking about it."
- Mood:
lonely
It's my birthday today.
Well happy birthday to me.
Gotta wake up in a few hours time.
Serve mass and then come home rest then frisbee.
Then my party.
I hope it'll be fun i guess.
It's my day today, i just wanna be happy that's all.
I'm trying my best to get the feeling away.
Everything is kinda hurting inside.
But well, what's the use, it's my birthday.
At least i could try to be happy and enjoy this day.
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that you can use any excuse to be happy.
Well happy birthday to me.
Gotta wake up in a few hours time.
Serve mass and then come home rest then frisbee.
Then my party.
I hope it'll be fun i guess.
It's my day today, i just wanna be happy that's all.
I'm trying my best to get the feeling away.
Everything is kinda hurting inside.
But well, what's the use, it's my birthday.
At least i could try to be happy and enjoy this day.
"We believe God wants you to know...
... that you can use any excuse to be happy.
You know how sometimes it seems that life is just throwing you one curved ball after another? Well, guess what, - you have a great way to respond! - you can use any excuse, any at all to be happy. Don't just soap your body in the shower - caress it and receive pleasure from touching and being touched. Don't just walk on the street - enjoy the fragrances of the trees and the flowers on your way. Don't just drive your car - sing karaoke to your favorite radio station."
Focus focus.
I know i know.
I'm very very tired of it.
But if i stop and rest for one day.
I'll end up failing.
If i fail, i can say goodbye to everything.
It really feels tied up inside.
But so what, i'll tear down these walls, and break away from these chains.
I'll try my best and do everything.
All just to gain your trust.
Focus, i know..
Focus focus.
I know i know.
I'm very very tired of it.
But if i stop and rest for one day.
I'll end up failing.
If i fail, i can say goodbye to everything.
It really feels tied up inside.
But so what, i'll tear down these walls, and break away from these chains.
I'll try my best and do everything.
All just to gain your trust.
Focus, i know..
- Mood:
sad
Well it's the end of the week again.
This week hasn't really been a productive week.
I think i'm not gonna get a good pass this time round on my chem test.
I hope all goes well.
2 more weeks to prelims, if i'm not wrong.
Gotta do well, get my head in the game.
Difficulties come and go, no matter what we can do it.
"God wants you to know...
... that it's your heart that knows who loves you, not your ears or eyes.
This week hasn't really been a productive week.
I think i'm not gonna get a good pass this time round on my chem test.
I hope all goes well.
2 more weeks to prelims, if i'm not wrong.
Gotta do well, get my head in the game.
Difficulties come and go, no matter what we can do it.
"God wants you to know...
... that it's your heart that knows who loves you, not your ears or eyes.
Listen to the words, and you can be fooled. Look at the actions, and you can be fooled. You are loved only when you feel loved. Who makes your heart soar now? Well, what are you waiting for? "
This words from the facebook God message really got me thinking.
Things can be said easily.
And stuff to express our love for someone can be done.
But deep inside, in our hearts.
Do we really wanna try,
Willingly?
And when we feel the love.
Why hesitate, why not put the trust in this person.
Why think and ponder so much when we know the person already loves us so much?
Sometimes i wonder, when we love someone so much we say we are willing to try.
We tell them forever, we tell them not to worry.
But do we think before saying all these?
How long are we willing to try?
How long is forever?
And are we really sure we can live up to our assurences?
It may not be a promise, but everything said and done has a meaning.
How long is,"i'll always be there for you."?
"Thick and thin."
How thick?
How thin?
I always ask myself before saying this.
I just don't wanna hurt anyone or say it just make that someone happy.
No, i will never do that.
Cause in the end, we'll hurt that person even more.
I guess i feel, we shouldn't think to deeply into stuff.
And we really have to think before saying stuff.
If not we'll end up fooling the other with our lies.
And that'll hurt them so very much.
I'll never let that happen to anyone.
And i guess we shouldn't let that happen to anyone too.
The mind wants to, but the heart just can't do it.
This words from the facebook God message really got me thinking.
Things can be said easily.
And stuff to express our love for someone can be done.
But deep inside, in our hearts.
Do we really wanna try,
Willingly?
And when we feel the love.
Why hesitate, why not put the trust in this person.
Why think and ponder so much when we know the person already loves us so much?
Sometimes i wonder, when we love someone so much we say we are willing to try.
We tell them forever, we tell them not to worry.
But do we think before saying all these?
How long are we willing to try?
How long is forever?
And are we really sure we can live up to our assurences?
It may not be a promise, but everything said and done has a meaning.
How long is,"i'll always be there for you."?
"Thick and thin."
How thick?
How thin?
I always ask myself before saying this.
I just don't wanna hurt anyone or say it just make that someone happy.
No, i will never do that.
Cause in the end, we'll hurt that person even more.
I guess i feel, we shouldn't think to deeply into stuff.
And we really have to think before saying stuff.
If not we'll end up fooling the other with our lies.
And that'll hurt them so very much.
I'll never let that happen to anyone.
And i guess we shouldn't let that happen to anyone too.
The mind wants to, but the heart just can't do it.
- Mood:
thoughtful
Hope is always there.
There is no such thing as not having hopes.
No matter how bad things get.
Hope will always be there.
Only you can destroy your own hopes.
Only i can destoy my own hopes.
I can't destroy yours, nor can you destoy mine.
Hope, it feels ever so good.
I just read the "God has a message" thingy on facebook.
And right now i feel real stuck.
That i really am at wits end of not knowing what to do anymore.
I guess like everyone says, no matter how bad things get, God will be there.
I really really am at wits end and i guess this msg brings me.. hope.
My reflection:
"When you don't know what to do, when all hope is lost, when there's no one to turn to.
God will be there, He will always be there, he'll give us opportunities.
Opportunities to succeed.
He may have already given us opportunities, but we either see it but don't take it,
Or are caught up with our worldly stuff like studies and work to notice it.
Take a moment, have a quiet time, listen to the soft promptings.
You'll never know God may come to your ear, and whisper a word of encouragement to you."
There is no such thing as not having hopes.
No matter how bad things get.
Hope will always be there.
Only you can destroy your own hopes.
Only i can destoy my own hopes.
I can't destroy yours, nor can you destoy mine.
Hope, it feels ever so good.
I just read the "God has a message" thingy on facebook.
And right now i feel real stuck.
That i really am at wits end of not knowing what to do anymore.
I guess like everyone says, no matter how bad things get, God will be there.
I really really am at wits end and i guess this msg brings me.. hope.
"On this day of your life, Russell, we believe God wants you to know...
... that God has an important purpose for you, and made everything possible for you to succeed.
... that God has an important purpose for you, and made everything possible for you to succeed.
That's not to say it's an easy purpose, or a convenient one. It might very well seem hard or even impossible, but it only looks that way. The truth is that one day you will look back and see how all the pieces fit together. And how your life has been a complete and utter success"
My reflection:
"When you don't know what to do, when all hope is lost, when there's no one to turn to.
God will be there, He will always be there, he'll give us opportunities.
Opportunities to succeed.
He may have already given us opportunities, but we either see it but don't take it,
Or are caught up with our worldly stuff like studies and work to notice it.
Take a moment, have a quiet time, listen to the soft promptings.
You'll never know God may come to your ear, and whisper a word of encouragement to you."
- Mood: reflective
I totally forgot something.
TMR GETTING BACK CL O's RESULTS!
I'm not mentally prepared at all, i'm super scared.
I hope i at least get a B.
Really really hope so.
Darn i'm really losing my study mood.
After the long weekend i've played till i forgot my studies.
Though i studied abit just now, i could feel the mood wasn't there.
Come on 2 more weeks to prelims!
Gotta work hard.
Frisbee rocks!
Been playing it for 3 days la haha.
29th Nativity games day whoohoo!
Frisbee time.
I hope i still mean something.
And i hope i didn't let you down again.
I'm trying my best.
I hope everything will work out fine.
Hmmm.
"Open our eyes, to see the things that make Your heart cry."
TMR GETTING BACK CL O's RESULTS!
I'm not mentally prepared at all, i'm super scared.
I hope i at least get a B.
Really really hope so.
Darn i'm really losing my study mood.
After the long weekend i've played till i forgot my studies.
Though i studied abit just now, i could feel the mood wasn't there.
Come on 2 more weeks to prelims!
Gotta work hard.
Frisbee rocks!
Been playing it for 3 days la haha.
29th Nativity games day whoohoo!
Frisbee time.
I hope i still mean something.
And i hope i didn't let you down again.
I'm trying my best.
I hope everything will work out fine.
Hmmm.
"Open our eyes, to see the things that make Your heart cry."
- Mood:
distressed
Today i ponned school.
Cause kinda waste time la.
Go school for 2 hours and sing song haha.
Slept till 9.30.
Ate and played, oh man.
Then 1.30 went P&W jamming all the till 7 and meeting.
Kinda feel real empty today.
Not in a bad way, as in the troubles and stuff are gone temporarily.
When we started playing and singing, i felt everything inside, just coming out through the singing.
The troubles inside just came out and they were gone.
Singing and playing worship songs really helps to ease my mind.
Though it was just a jamming session.
The feeling was still felt, every word in each song had a meaning.
And i feel real good to sing praises and worship songs to Him.
Well i hope i'll be able to spread this feeling to the people out there someday.
By showing them how to praise God and worship him in music.
God gave us fingers to play instruments, He gave us voices to sing and he gave us music, to praise and worship him.
Cause kinda waste time la.
Go school for 2 hours and sing song haha.
Slept till 9.30.
Ate and played, oh man.
Then 1.30 went P&W jamming all the till 7 and meeting.
Kinda feel real empty today.
Not in a bad way, as in the troubles and stuff are gone temporarily.
When we started playing and singing, i felt everything inside, just coming out through the singing.
The troubles inside just came out and they were gone.
Singing and playing worship songs really helps to ease my mind.
Though it was just a jamming session.
The feeling was still felt, every word in each song had a meaning.
And i feel real good to sing praises and worship songs to Him.
Well i hope i'll be able to spread this feeling to the people out there someday.
By showing them how to praise God and worship him in music.
God gave us fingers to play instruments, He gave us voices to sing and he gave us music, to praise and worship him.
Saviour King-Hillsongs United
Let now the weak say I have strength
By the Spirit of power that raised Christ from the dead
Let now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is in Him and I'm more than blessed
Let now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for Your Son's holy Name
And with the heavens we declare
You are our King
We love You Lord, we worship You
You are our God, You alone are good (to verse 2: 1st time)
You asked Your Son to carry this
The heavy cross, our weight of sin
I love You Lord, I worship You
Hope which was lost, now stands renewed
I give my life to honour this
The love of Christ, the Saviour King
Let now Your church shine as the bride
That You saw in Your heart as You offered up Your life
Let now the lost be welcomed home
By the saved and redeemed those adopted as Your own
- Mood:
hopeful
2 and a half more weeks left to prelims!
I passed my vectors test today and yeah real glad i'm improving.
And i did well for chem.
But it's not the end of the race, it's almost time for the final sprint.
The part i've been saving all my energy for.
The part where i'll have to let it all out.
With just a bit more effort and sacrifice, i know i'll be able to do it.
I want to do well, but wanting isn't enough.
Gotta work for it, gotta work hard for it.
11 points here i come!
Kinda scared next week, it's chinese results day.
I passed my vectors test today and yeah real glad i'm improving.
And i did well for chem.
But it's not the end of the race, it's almost time for the final sprint.
The part i've been saving all my energy for.
The part where i'll have to let it all out.
With just a bit more effort and sacrifice, i know i'll be able to do it.
I want to do well, but wanting isn't enough.
Gotta work for it, gotta work hard for it.
11 points here i come!
Kinda scared next week, it's chinese results day.
- Mood:
determined
Profile
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1)
guitaroomadness- guitaroomadness
Syndicate
